hair tragedy

I may have told you I wasn't happy with my hair. Well, I had a meeting at church on Sunday that lasted til about 2. Afterwards I went by WalMart to get a cut and highlights. Their sign up sheet said No Chemicals, so I knew I wasn't getting highlights! But, still wanted the cut. Good thing I REALLY wanted it, the wait was over an hour. Only two stylists back there.

So, while I'm sitting there a little girl, not sure if I knew her or not from school or where, but, we got to talking. She showed me the picture from her hair book for her hairdo. It was Jamie Lee Curtis' picture!! I told her I had THAT picture on my board at school!!! And that it was the one that I was coming back for today!

OK...so it's finally my turn and I go back and tell her what I want done. I know I can't get color, but here is the style. Longer on top so I can do the front section that lays down and to the side, and poofy in the back and short on sides over the ears. She reiterated the whole thing and knew exactly what I wanted. She gets to cutting and I'm thinking UM...WHAT are you doing?! The top..the part I wanted to be longer was CUT!! I didn't say anything...I mean once you have a cut there's no going back! lol

As I was talking with her I told her that I had wanted to have gotten highlights. That my hair had come back white/gray after chemo, that I colored it BROWN but it came out RED..that I highlighted it BLOND, but it came out LIGHT RED!! lol She laughed then turned to the lady at the counter...We're going to go ahead and do a quick cap on her...She's had chemo and some hair tragedy lately and we need to get it taken care of! Oh my gosh!! I couldn't believe it!

So while she is off mixing the color I flick my fingers through the hair..as she has it all combed to the front (no style-about to color it). So I make it go to the side and across the head like normal. I thought OH MY GOSH!!! I love it!! Dang, they know SO much more than I do! It was styled and shaped perfectly.

She does the highlights on top and it turned out really pretty!!! I went home..ALMOST went by Donna's first, but thought...show your family first!! I go in and Graland's mouth about drops! I ask Is it OK?! He says YES!!! I love it!! It's you again! I told him I almost went by Donna's cause it's NEVER going to look like this again!! lol He says Get in the car and go over!!

So, I am feeling good about myself. I learn more and more to keep my mouth shut. God has such bigger plans than I do. He wants so much more for me..and for most I would think...but we want to have it our own way and we just mess things up.

covenant bracelet

I've been reading Believing God by Beth Moore...awesome book!! It talks about a shield of faith encompassing 5 beliefs: 1 God is who He says He is, 2 God can do what He says He can do, 3 I am who God made me, 4 I can do all things through Christ, 5 God's Word is alive and active in me. There was also a part about finding a weak part of your life and giving it to God and making a covenant with Him. It is funny...Donna has been reading the same book and called and said I need an accountability partner...and when she told me what hers was...I said "I want that too...count me in!" The weakness was self-control in the area of sweets. Now, this started the weekend before Easter (March 16) so it came at a perfect time. I had already eaten everything there was to eat since Christmas and Valentines and I knew how bad I was in the candy department. Buying whatever candy bar was there when I checked out of WalMart and whatever I had for rewards in my classroom. Part of the book suggested wearing a covenant bracelet to remind you of your promise to God. So Donna made some bracelets and we've worn them since that day, never taking them off. At the end of the covenant you make the bracelet into a bookmark. You set a date for however long you want your covenant to last..and we chose 3 months. Have I done it? YES! Well, I can't get the credit...it all goes to God. It has been amazing that I have not wanted or desired anything sweet. I can go through the checkout and not buy anything. I can have chocolate bars in my classroom and they remain there UNeaten! It HAS to be God as I have NO will-power. My covenant will end of my birthday: May 31. I'll be able to have birthday cake to celebrate. I have not had any cake, cookie, candy, pie, etc for this time.

Life Flight

I have a student "G" who has changed medications several times since coming to our school. Very ADHD, loud, argumentative, doesn't let things drop. He is very bright, but I have a hard time keeping him focused..he'll sleep (meds) or stare into space. Mom/doctors changed his meds again. So it is his 2nd day on this medication and we've already had some going back and forth during class...not doing work, etc. I say that's fine, whatever you don't do in class can easily be done during recess. (Usually gets any student to finishing their work in record time!) We come back from lunch and he's got his head back and looks like he needs to vomit. I ask if he needs to throw up (while other student's are coming in getting their seats) and he says no. But he looks strange to me...not his usual strange-ness (smirky looks, mad faces, head rolling...which I know are all med related)..so I'm not calling him strange...but his mannerisms... Anyway, he doesn't look right and his arms are out and frankly he is scaring me to death. I take him by the arm and tell him to put his arm on mine and we leave to go to the nurse. I normally just send them down with a note, esp if I have a class in there. But I left w/o even having work on their desks...which I have NEVER done!!

I walk G down the hall and as I walk in the nurse's office I say that he is scaring me. She sits him down and immediately asks for his emergency card and the phone. You would think Christ Himself was there...and He was. Our nurse is the most amazing person I know. She sat so calmly with him and just was so upbeat and happy when it was evident to me that she was screaming inside...she knew the seriousness of this and never let on to G.

We try calming G, but he keeps putting his head way back...he is afraid his tongue is going to fall out. We're keeping his arms back in his lap and stroking his back and face to keep his attention and focus. She calls Mom and gets her on her way. He continually puts tissue in his mouth..I guess so he can feel something there...I don't know. Nurse says he is having a bad reaction to this new med. (OK...by this time Principal has come in and other aids, etc...my room has been taken care of though they have no idea what has happened to me...just that I need someone in my room)

We wait a few minutes on Mom and the nurse says, I can't wait any longer...I need an ambulance. They came immediately, assessed him, and said We're not taking him local, he needs to go to Hermann in Houston.

Paramedics put him on the stretcher and roll him down the hallway, which was completely empty..thankfully. I didn't know until later that they had kept classes from coming down the hall so they wouldn't see anything and be scared. Much longer story...short...he was lifeflighted to Hermann and by then they had given him something to take away all his bad reactions. I saw him the next day with Mom...we had an ARD for speech for him. He was doing great, but Mom kept him out for the day to rest him up again. Our morning work for the day was to make Get Well Soon cards, which was neat. G was able to tell the class about his helicopter ride and he got to pick up all his cards. He is now completely off all his meds and I feel he is easier to be around now. Yes, he has his tendencies, but he is OK. The Lord taught me a lot about love and patience. G and I play frisbee everyday at recess (well, a BUNCH of us play it). I see how fragile each of these students are and keep a keener eye on them. I just thank God so much that He allowed me to see past what I would normally call "please go sit down" behavior. I beat myself up thinking "What if I attributed this to just how he is?" and told him to go sit down. I have to think that God's spirit interceded and took control over this situation.

Liking it now!

OK...this is STUPID I know, BUT...I like my hair now! :) We watched Freaky Friday with Jamie Lee Curtis in it and I HAVE that hair!! lol So I did some curling in the back and some waxing in the front on the bangs and it looks really cute! I just needed to do something with it. I've grown fond of the color. Got some eye brow pencil and using that now too. My brows just didn't come in very dark and they are rather hard to see...so I was kinda blank there! So feeling real good about the whole "look"! :)

no more white hair!

Well, this weekend I dyed my hair a golden brown. If you know my hair, that means it is RED! I can put in pure blond and my hair comes out red! :( I had really thought it would come out brown and am not particularly happy with it. I didn't want a red tint to it, but that's what I've got. I know people are being nice when they say they like it, but I hear Oh, but I liked the white...it looked so good! It made me feel old and it made me LOOK old. I wish I could lighten what I have now but it would probably make it worse than it is.

One year! 04/09/08

It is hard to believe..it seems as if it has been forever, but then like it was just yesterday... but one year ago we drove to MDAnderson to remove the cancer. Ironically, I got a phone message on the machine yesterday from our local hospital from mammography...saying something concerning last years mammogram. I just wanted to laugh...like, WHAT?! Did my mammogram come back bad or something?! lol Playing phone tag at the moment with them. Really DO want to know what she wants to tell me!

Guitar is going great! I am still loving it! Learning more chords and able to read music pretty well. Try not to play anything with a B or an F in it though! lol I am looking like mad for a guitar though...at the pawn shops and on ebay. I'll be teaching summer school this summer to pay for my guitar!! YEAH!!! I am SOOOOOOOOO excited!!!

made the 15 minute club!!

We finally did it...the 15 minute club! We did it on Friday, and I made it then...but had 3 kids absent. So, ran it again today with them and made it again. I am really going to miss my runs with them. I am very much considering running in the mornings before school to keep this up.

a bit of depression

I went pretty low last night. I wore a blouse that had a band on the sleeves near the elbows and could feel that it was a little tight on the left side. Had kind of felt it a couple days now. I looked all over for the fabric tape measure and couldn't find it. Finally told Graland why I was looking for it...to measure my arm girth. Told him I think I know what MAY be causing it, but didn't want to tell him what it was. I showed him my fingertips. "You have a cut?" No, but I've been working my fingers every day and they stay a little sore from practicing on the guitar. I practice every day...I love it!! I just started crying. I found something that I may be good at, and it comes back to bite me. :( When we went to bed all I could ask Graland was "Why does God hate me so much? It's bad enough that I sleep in sweat every night, but take away something I've grown to love?!" Then I cried some more because I knew I was sinning by even thinking something like that! I am SO thankful for how far He has brought me...I could not have done this alone.

At first I thought I had to give it up entirely. But we agreed that I would just cut back on practice..to maybe every other day or shorter session when I do practice. And I had JUST learned "B"!!! And YES!!! that was a HUGE accomplishment! It's a doozie. So today was the first day in about a month that I haven't picked up the guitar. So, in the meantime, I am still browsing through ebay "shopping" for just the right guitar. Acoustic, Gibson Epiphone... as if I know ANYTHING about kinds of guitars!! lol But, I did ask around on my ladies board and it happened to be one that I had kept looking at on ebay and one of the ladies said her husband has it and loves it. I have a little in my ebay account and am waiting for just the right steal.

Doing better today though...and actually my arm is doing much better as well!! At first glance you wouldn't think there was any swelling at all, but it is something I can feel, and I don't want it to get out of hand.